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Saturday, March 31, 2012

Many Are The Plans....


I cannot believe this project is almost over! I’m a few months away from completing my teaching assignment and though I have done so much, there is still so much more I would like to do.  I was blessed to come to my home country but at times, I think I have used it to my disadvantage. Of late, I feel like I’ve relaxed a lot. At times, I wonder if I was in a totally different country and had to learn a different language and deal with a different culture, how would I cope? How would I work with that situation? I don’t think I would be as lazy as I have been these days. I truly believe I am in Ghana to discover more a background that I couldn’t have learned in the States. In that case, things are going really well. My Twi vocabulary has greatly increased and I take great pleasure in my grandparent’s company. Touring Ghana and mingling with those in the community have created wonderful, special memories. As for working in Ghana, I have done well. My students are doing great, but I think I should take more of the opportunity to work in the community, with local primary students and teachers and stuff. I will admit: I am somewhat of a creative person but I sometimes lack the ability to see through with my ideas. I struggle with motivation! (There! I said it Tim!)

I have a few more months in Ghana and making the most of it will not be in going to all the cool places, but knowing that I have made an impact in the best way possible. Then at times, what in the heck does that mean? Making an impact? I reread an post from one of my favvvveeee Ghana blogs maameous.com, and Esi personally hit a soft spot in the old noodle. One comment she made stuck out: “You measure your success by assessing progress in the task you set for yourself.” Hmmmmm…..With this teaching project, I have made many goals, some to build myself professionally and personally. As I reach the final stretch of this program, my aim is to continue to make strides in the classroom, gain the boldness to do more underground work outside the assigned role, and continue to work on my Twi. I think constant reminder of purpose and goal-setting will keep one motivated, and hopefully, consistent.
                                                                                 
                                                                                  *****

I am the kind of girl who lives according to a plan. My roommate and I used to spend blissful hours “listing” anything and everything we can think of. I had my semester classroom schedule planned and posted to my board before the first term was up. I still have all of my daily agendas dating from the 12th grade (I only hoard “important” thingsJ). On one of my lists of life (lol), I planned out my college and professional career to tee. Amazingly, everything turned out the way I wanted it to be. Well, that’s because I worked darn hard to see them through.  But even when my plans became realities, I still felt… lost and somewhat anxious. I had it all planned out to the point that I couldn’t plan anymore. It was scary. I was teaching at for my choice school county, living on my own, doing my own thing and still felt unsatisfied.  I honestly was afraid that I was going to get comfortable as a schoolteacher and not challenge myself to do more with my life. I mean, I love lesson planning and Expo markers that muchJ So when I started listing again, I listed my dreams. The dreams that I thought would remain just dreams. And one of those dreams was to live in Ghana long-term. Possibly work in Ghana or Africa. You see, I always had a thang for Africa. I just always wanted to be a part of it, directly a part of it. So when I sought to work or volunteer in Africa, I was beginning to entertain another side of my heart that I had long covered up. It was too fresh and out of my plan that I was afraid to give it a shot. But I did, and I ended up here.  I ended doing exactly what I always wanted to do! And now, upon my return, I hope to go to graduate school to build upon the skills and knowledge I have gained in Ghana. My heart was always set on Teacher’s College for a couple of reasons.
1. I never thought I was smart enough for Columbia. I remember when my college roommate bestie told me to consider it in the future, I mentally laughed and pushed the thought away…..But it was not too far away:)  
2. TC has the only Center for African Education in the country, which I know of. What a perfect match. 

So being accepted to this school is a dream and blessing come true. My only thing is accepting the acceptance. Accepting that maybe, this is the path God is steering me to and has been for a while (in spite of all my mega planning, He left this one out!) That maybe, He believes in me more than I believe in myself. That just maybe, I can mesh my love for Africa and my passion for education into one big ball of Oprah-changing power! I don’t know if I can do Columbia. The price is just not rightL . It didn’t stop me from applying but now, I wonder if it can do enough to stop me from going. Without the support of a fair financial aid package, I don’t know if I can give in to the addition of student loans but golly, if you are a reader and if you can even somewhat care about me enough to read this much of my rambling, put in a word to God for me will ya? I’m praying up a storm over here all on my own. I just feel that He will make a way for me… 

Jeremiah 29:11 anyone????

M

2 comments:

naturallyjanet said...

Mabel, I was thinking of you today, and after reading your post I now know why...I'm here to tell you I'm so very proud of you. Some people write their dreams down and store it under their pillow for a tomorrow that never comes, but you've made your tomorrows a reality. And for that you are one of my (s)heros...now about Columbia....you are going...PERIOD. Don't look at the price tag, close your eyes and go...if need be you might get a grant or some loan forgiveness program...go...God will provide...believe in his plans for you. Be well and enjoy the rest of your time in our homeland and for the love of god start shopping for me!!!!

Ama Kyei said...

@janet- I've already got your gifts in mind and you know I'm enjoying every second of Ghana.... Thanks for your support Janet, really. It sounds corny and I may be too hard on myself, but I just want to the best that I can be.... without joining the army. And I know only God can continue to make that a possibility. Love you!

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